Sunday, 11 September 2011

My Mother: Who's He? I like Him. Me: Lil Wayne.

My mother looked at ToddBlog and told me that she likes the look of Lil Wayne. This struck me as absurd for a minute because her taste in men runs more toward the Jeremy Irons end of the spectrum but then I remembered that my mum is the original rebel. She is, like, a fucking rebel in the truest and purest sense of the word. There's no posing, no posturing, and no Ramones t-shirts. Just an instinctive intolerance for rules and enough nerve to act upon her intolerance. Daily. Every.Fucking.Day. Rules? She cares not for rules.

She inherited it from her father. I never met him. One of his favourite expressions was "rules are for fools - wisemen follow guidelines", and he used to employ this phrase when people would pull him up for breaking rules - overtaking slow drivers on the shoulders of roads, for example. Apparently he used to do that a lot.

During the war he cut off a man's leg underwater. The man was trapped in the sea, his leg was stuck. There was a doctor but he couldn't swim so it fell on him to amputate it. The doctor gave him some rudimentary instructions and he had to dive down under the water and hack off the leg. He freed the man but he died anyway. After all the wars he became a barrister. He used his wig case to carry fruit to and from court. Pears were his favourite.

Anyway, with this in my mother's genes is it any wonder that photo of Lil Wayne leaving prison wearing a huge grin and sucking on a cigar struck her as pretty awesome? No, no it is not.


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