Old Man

Earlier today an old geezer in the news agency said “you look bright and lively this morning!”

“Well, I don’t want to seize up” I told him.

I don’t know what the hell I meant. Was I flaunting my mobility? The elderly often make me come out with slightly off-kilter remarks. Sometimes they’re lewd, even. They love it, too, the filthy old cunts.

“You wouldn’t seize up” he said with an emphysemic wheeze.

Maybe not, I thought, but bright and lively? You are way off, Pops, WAY OFF.