Saturday 23 July 2011

Sage Advice for 14 year old Girls


You know how magazines do lavish, aspirational photographic features titled 'Inside Chloe Sevigny's Closet' or what have you? This is my version. I call it 'Winter Washing Line'.
There's a party going on at my place, obviously.

Take out the g-strings and you'd be forgiven for thinking you were looking at the freshly laundered underclothes of a depression-era farmhand.



Since this is probably as close as I will get to talking about clothing in a civilian sense, here is a small story.

Two fourteen year old girls, let's call them Girl1 and Girl2, hanging out in esteemed Bega establishment The Niagara, renowned the region over for their winning chip, gravy and cockroach combination. Girl1's father, who was a lovely, Kombi driving man happened to wander in with some vaguely seedy guy in tow, because vaguely seedy types were the kind of clientele The Niagara excelled in attracting. They sat down with us for awhile. Someone mentioned something about Girl1 working, getting a job or something, and the guy, let's call him Lawrence, since that was his name, looks her over long and hard and says "you could get a job here. Be easy. All you'd need is a pair of loose hot pants and you'd be right."

Girls 1 and 2 thought for years that this one was of the nastiest and funniest quotes to ever be given oxygen. Kind of in the Marla Singer "I haven't been fucked like that since grade school" vein of nasty. I can no longer speak for Girl1 on this but, as Girl2, I kind of still do.

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